Although it's unfortunately not her actual death (that might be a five star film right there) it is nice to see her impaled in a way that can't be rented at Hot to Trot Video. The half star I am giving this film is for the death of Paris Hilton. However, since you shouldn't under any circumstances see this piece of garbage, please don't fear reading on. If you haven't seen the promotions for this film or any of Paris Hilton's eight million public appearances of late, the following paragraph could be a spoiler. They are forgettable and don't matter except for the bonus that, as each character dies, there is one less moron quipping the writer's stale dialogue. The death scenes look pretty much like the death scenes in just about every other horror film. First-timer Jaume Serra never tries to do anything interesting visually at all. The directing is completely stagnant and generic. And even that is hindered by some terrible CG work. House of Wax has absolutely nothing going for it except the wax gimmick, which itself doesn't even pay off until the very end. Still, there isn't a scare to be found anywhere near this film. From there the film's pacing picks up only slightly.
It takes at least 40 minutes before the first death scene (a character who is so stupid you are practically relieved when he's finally done in). The writing is so strained that you can't wait for the first member to get sliced up. The tedious set-up and painful dialogue of the first act of this film is almost coma inducing. Only Chad Michael Murray and Elisha Cuthbert's characters, Nick and Carly respectively, possess even a hit of wit or self-preservation skills, and even they make decisions that would be completely inexcusable for anyone with an I.Q. These are reprehensible characters that exist only to be led to the slaughter. This is not simply a bad horror film, it's a boring one. Little by little, the friends are picked off as they try to escape their own wax-covered fates. They have been covered in wax and placed on display to create an entire town that is one big wax museum. They look for help and soon realize that the majority of this town's inhabitants are no longer breathing. The next day car trouble forces them to locate the nearest town, which appears to have been abandoned. Along the way, they stop off to camp for the night in a secluded area. The group play teens on a road trip to see the big football game. It is directed by first-timer Jaume Serra. Loosely remade from the Vincent Price classic, Paris Hilton herself says this film's major improvement is that "The original didn't really have a hot cast." House of Wax stars Chad Michael Murray, Elisha Cuthbert, Jared Padalecki, Brian Van Holt, Jon Abrahams and, of course, Paris Hilton. House of Wax features a cast apparently chosen from their headshots rather than any particular ability or connection to the material. As a result, we are left with the most unfortunate evolution of the genre: A trite, unimaginative mishmash of terrible dialogue, ridiculous scenarios and characters so mind-blowingly stupid you prey for their death. Although most of this year's crop have received poor critical response, they open big ( Amityville, The Ring, Boogeyman and Hide and Seek all opened in first place). Now, in 2005, horror films are as popular as ever.
#House of wax cast series#
In the '90s the Scream series and a slew of imitators turned the genre on its head, creating a self-referential brand of horror that made fun of itself and the genres conventions while at once existing within the genre's confines.
The genre thrived in the '80s with pop culture icons like Freddy, Michael Meyers, Jason and Chucky slicing and dicing unsuspecting teens who had been drinking or fornicating. In the '70s and '80s Italian horror directors Dario Argento and Mario Bava created what would become the modern slasher film. Monster movies like Frankenstein and Dracula created the genre, directors like Alfred Hitchcock refined it and scared the hell out of us. The genre of horror has gone through a number of evolutions.
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